"The Man of a Thousand Miseries"

Once there was a man which dreamed of having true happiness. He believed his goals were realistic because he wasn't asking for the moon or the stars....Or so he thought......

Many years, heartbreaks and tears later, this same man is but a shell of what he once was. But he still hangs on so dearly to his impossible dream....for the dream is the only meaning to his miserable existence. If he gave it up, he would surely wither and die....

He has picked up the pieces and gone on the many times his dream has been shattered, but the pieces keep getting smaller and more numerous, making it nearly impossible to rebuild...

Many years ago, he thought that there was light at the end of the tunnel, but now he realizes the tunnel is actually an abyss that he is sinking deeper and deeper into. His heart is aching, his ambition is waning, and his faith is shaken.

He is a man with simple desires, needs, and pleasures. But for some reason unbeknownest to him, he can not succeed in realizing this obviously simple goal!!! He is a soldier without an army, A rebel without a cause, a sun without a sky, a moon without the stars, or a king without a queen...

He is gentle, loyal, caring, softhearted, even tempered, and trusting.....But too long a suffering can and will turn the heart to stone. He knows this and it really scares him, because if this happens, then the dream will vanish, and the man shall cease to exist. Lord knows what Phoenix may arise from the ashes that was once the man...

The hope is quickly becoming despair, the brilliance of the sacred dream is diminishing...The softness of heart is turning to steel, the warmth within is growing cold...This soul full of love and light is becoming a void of sorrow and darkness.

The tortured soul of a man starved for love and tenderness is begging for mercy, but his plea's have gone unanswered, so the soul is weak from the agony of years. The plea's from within have went to mere whispers now, soon to be no more..

The consciousness of the man is in bitter dispute with the spirit, rather to try again...Or to give up once and for all. The dawning of grim realization is upon him, he feels it, but refuses to accept defeat...Now his dream is nearly unimaginable to him, he can not see it so clearly...Is he residing in the wrong century? Incarnated on the wrong planet??? Or could he be stark raving mad, and he just doesn't realize it??

What is...or what was this impossible dream? Simply put...it was or maybe...still is...to love, and be loved by that one "special lady". Not a partnership, or a steady sex toy...but a sharing, caring relationship that he could share his every thought, desire, fantasy, his every breath, with that one special someone. The someone he could trust completely, love unconditionally, share lifes ups and downs, and grow old with...But things like that just aren't important in this day and age, so what started as an innocent dream, turned into an endless nightmare that has turned this man into a miserable wretch.

So the man remains, keeping his thousand miseries within him, alone, just as he always has been, and as he will inevitably remain, till the man is...no more...WHY??? Because the man refuses to accept defeat, and "go with the flow". His stubborness is his weakness, and in the end, shall be his destruction.

He knows these things, but yet he hangs on...Is he foolish? NO...It's because it is better to have died trying for something worthwhile, than to waste your life aimlessly, as so many people do, that claim they are enjoying themselves...

Maybe this man is far out in left field, and his vision is blurred, but I believe that he is right. I know this man very well..............For I am he.........

THIS WAS WRITTEN BY NATURESPIRIT #2 SHORTLY BEFORE HE MET #1...SO YOU SEE....SPIRIT DOES HEAR US..LOVE WILL FIND US ALL......