How Do You Forget?
Matthew 5:20-24, "For I say unto you, That except your righteousness shall exceed [the righteousness] of the scribes and Pharisees, ye shall in no case enter into the kingdom of heaven. Ye have heard that it was said by them of old time, Thou shalt not kill; and whosoever shall kill shall be in danger of the judgment: But I say unto you, That whosoever is angry with his brother without a cause shall be in danger of the judgment: and whosoever shall say to his brother, Raca, shall be in danger of the council: but whosoever shall say, Thou fool, shall be in danger of hell fire. Therefore if thou bring thy gift to the altar, and there rememberest that thy brother hath ought against thee; Leave there thy gift before the altar, and go thy way; first be reconciled to thy brother, and then come and offer thy gift."
To Harmonize or Settle A Disagreement.
To Reunite --- To Make Peace --- To Agree
To Restore To Fellowship And Confidence.
A. Reconciliation is the Proof that forgiveness has been Given and Accepted.
B. Matthew 5:23-24, "Therefore if thou bring thy gift to the altar, and there rememberest that thy brother hath ought against thee; Leave there thy gift before the altar, and go thy way; first be reconciled to thy brother, and then come and offer thy gift."
C. II Corinthians 5:18, "And all things [are] of God, who hath reconciled us to himself by Jesus Christ, and hath given to us the ministry of reconciliation;"
Matthew 5:9, "Blessed [are] the peacemakers: for they shall be called the children of God."
D. You must be Reconciled To Your Brother before you can truly say you love God.
I John 4:20, "If a man say, I love God, and hateth his brother, he is a liar: for he that loveth not his brother whom he hath seen, how can he love God whom he hath not seen?"
Now, How Do I Accomplish Reconciliation?
How Do I Love Someone Who Has Hurt Me Badly?
How Do I Forget
I. Be Willing To Forget As Well As To Forgive.
A. Willfully Forgetting must follow forgiveness in order to guard against the return of Anger and Bitterness.
1. Many people do Not Want to forget!
"Well, I just want God to take the thoughts out of my mind so that won't think of them any more."
If God did so, you would only come up with something else.
2. Hebrews 12:15, "Looking diligently lest
any man fail of the grace of God; lest any [root] of [bitterness] springing
3. To forgive and not forget is simply to bury the hatchet with the Handle Sticking Out.
a. I Peter 4:8, "And above all things have fervent charity among yourselves: for charity shall cover the multitude of sins."
b. Proverbs 17:9, "He that covereth a transgression seeketh love;"
B. Forgetting is not "Holy Amnesia" --- which erases the past.
God Will Not Erase The Memory From Your Mind!
1. Wilfully Forgetting is the experience of healing which draws the poison from the wound.
2. You may recall the hurt --- but you will Not Relive It --- the memory is powerless to arouse or anger you.
3. Use it as a Testimony.
II. How Do I Become Willing To Forget?
J Begin By Not Keeping A Record of The Wrong or Filing Away Evidence For Future Use.
I Corinthians 13:5, "Doth not behave itself unseemly, --- thinketh no evil;"
Philippians 4:8, "Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things [are] honest, whatsoever things [are] just, whatsoever things [are] pure, whatsoever things [are] lovely, whatsoever things [are] of good report; if [there be] any virtue, and if [there be] any praise, think on these things."
J Don't Talk About It Every Chance You Get --- Refusing To Dwell or Meditate on The Event.
Proverbs 29:11, "A fool uttereth all his mind: but a wise [man] keepeth it in till afterwards."
Psalms 141:3, "Set a watch, O LORD, before my mouth; keep the door of my lips."
Psalms 19:14, "Let the words of my mouth, and the meditation of my heart, be acceptable in thy sight, O LORD, my strength, and my redeemer."
Proverbs 17:9, "He that covereth a transgression seeketh love; but he that repeateth a matter separateth [very] friends."
J Look Ahead To The Future.
Philippians 3:13-14, "Brethren, I count not myself to have apprehended: but [this] one thing [I do], forgetting those things which are behind, and reaching forth unto those things which are before, I press toward the mark for the prize of the high calling of God in Christ Jesus."
J Say Good Things About The Offender And Do Helpful Deeds For Him/Her.
Luke 6:27-28, "But I say unto you which hear, Love your enemies, do good to them which hate you, Bless them that curse you, and pray for them which despitefully use you."
Remember how Kids are After They Have Been In A Fight ...
1 Cor 14:20, "Brethren, be not children in understanding: howbeit in malice be ye children, but in understanding be men."
J Allow God To Erase Your Painful Memories.
Genesis 41:51, "And Joseph called the name of the firstborn Manasseh: For God, [said he], hath made me forget all my toil, and all my father's house."
III. Pray For God To Bless The One Who Offended You --- And Thank God For Lessons You Have Learned --- And For Spiritual Growth.
A. Matthew 5:44, "But I say unto you, Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you,..."
B. Thanksgiving is a sign that you believe God Is In Control of your life --- and the lives of those who wrong you.
1. We should thank God, even if we don't feel like it --- do it as an Act of The Will.
2. The amount of Time That Lapse between an adverse circumstance and our giving thanks to God indicates our Spiritual Maturity.
C. It's impossible to sincerely Pray for someone and at the same time hate or be Resentful toward him.
1. Forbearance is not a "grin and bear it" type reaction --- while we're Knotted Up Inside.
2. It's not saying: "I'm going to love this person if it kills me."
3. A person who forbears is Not Touchy and will Not Easily Take Offense.
4. Romans 15:7, "Wherefore receive ye one another, as Christ also received us to the glory of God."
D. When we have truly forgiven --- our offenders and those around us Will Know It --- you don't have to tell them.
1. Christ unique plan is that Non-Christians come to know of God's love through Christians and their proper Relationship With One Another.
2. John 13:35, "By this shall all [men] know that ye are my disciples, if ye have Love One To Another."
IV. Accept The Offender As An "Equal" --- Trust And Respect Him As Though He Had Never Wronged You.
A. Romans 3:24, "Being justified (just as though you had never sined) freely by his grace through the redemption that is in Christ Jesus:"
1. This is Acceptance Without Exception.
2. Ephesians 4:32, "And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ's sake hath forgiven you."
B. Healing can only come when we get our minds off ourselves and show Concern For Others.
1. Loving can be the very thing that Persuades Our Offender we're sincere and challenges them to change.
2. Biblical Love is active:
a. It is not necessarily a warm feeling or pleasant emotion.
b. It is the Decision of Your Will.
C. Colossians 3:12-14, "Put on therefore, as the elect of God, holy and beloved, bowels of mercies, kindness, humbleness of mind, meekness, longsuffering; Forbearing one another, and forgiving one another, if any man have a quarrel against any: even as Christ forgave you, so also [do] ye. And above all these things [put on] charity, which is the bond of perfectness."
D. I Thessalonians 5:15-18, "See that none render evil for evil unto any [man]; but ever follow that which is good, both among yourselves, and to all [men]. Rejoice evermore. Pray without ceasing. In every thing give thanks: for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you."
E. Many ex-cult members claim --- they were originally Attracted To The Cult by the Kindness, Acceptance, and Love they received from is members.
((( Joseph --- example of forgiveness )))
Romans 14:4, "Who art thou that judgest another man's servant? to his own master he standeth or falleth."
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